Monthly Archives: October 2015

Loss Of A Child Does NOT “happen for a reason”.

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Grief is not something that can be fixed. It can only be carried

LOSS OF A CHILD DOES NOT “HAPPEN FOR A REASON”. Loss of a child, or any tragedy does not “happen for a reason”. A friend sent me this article from the website of Tim Lawrence called The Adversity Within. It is well worth a share. I particularly love the idea he so perfectly and simply articulated, that grief is not something we choose to go through or not, or something that we need to be cured of. I have also come to understand that it is, in itself, part of surviving tragic loss. He writes, “You take responsibility for how you choose … Continue reading →

Milestones; To Recognize Small Steps of Courage and Healing.

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THE REALITY With the significant “firsts” ( his birthday, Thanksgiving & Christmas ) heading our way, I’m feeling a bit unsteady and vulnerable right now. I’m frightened, to be perfectly honest. I’m afraid for so many reasons. Every day is still uncharted territory. Other than  acute awareness of my loss, I never know what’s coming and being on guard for that uncertainty wears on a person. I know that every morning when I don’t go upstairs to wake him for school, Aiden dies for me again. Every ascent up the stairs face to face with his bedroom, he dies. Every time I see … Continue reading →

…And She Laughs At The Future

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And She laughs at the future… I heard that Proverbs scripture in church this week. It spoke to me, but in a melancholy sort of way. It spoke to me of who I was not. What I am not capable of. I felt that deep in my soul because that is not always how it was, I am not who I was. I not only laughed at the future, I embraced it with open welcoming arms. I am a planner. I planned our future in detail. I loved looking forward to the next year, the next holidays, the next birthday, the next stage of … Continue reading →